A letter to my friend Debra Forton Nave

Published 1:38 pm Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Dear Debra:

You know that if we’d met under any other circumstances, we’d probably never have become friends. It’s funny how God places people in your path for a specific purpose and season. There’s no doubt that that He did that for us.

I realize that from the outside, we were an odd pair; a real life “Mutt and Jeff.” There were a lot of people who questioned our friendship / whether or not we were “good for each other”. I never understood that; I believe that in reality, the opposite was true. Being accountable to each other, and knowing without doubt that come hell or high water, right or wrong, the other would still be there… and better yet, would call you out, made us both try a little harder to be a little better. Neither of us wanted to let the other down.

Sure, it’s clear that we both made our share of mistakes …and paid dearly for them, but those mistakes gave us both a genuine compassion, and appreciation for the things that really matter. An appreciation that we may never have gained otherwise. We were blessed (although as I remember, it didn’t quite feel that way at the time) to learn first hand that trash is disposable; people aren’t. Garbage can be recycled / put to better use…and so can circumstances and people, given a little help.

I have no idea of where to go from here. How do I process or wrap my mind around the loss of you? Every girl needs a friend with whom she can truly be herself…someone to share her secrets; who will hold those secrets now? I keep waiting to wake up from this nightmare, or for someone to call and tell me that it’s all been a horrible mistake…to be able to tell you one more time that “you aint right” and have you respond, with that mischievous laugh that I loved so much, “ but I aint wrong.” Sadly, I have no other choice than to accept that neither will ever happen.

I know that you know that I loved you. I want everyone else to know I love you still. I feel blessed to have had you in my life. Though it was only for

a season, I’ll never forget you or the difference that you made…and I’ll never let your children forget what a wonderful friend that their mother was to me.

I love you Deb.



Your sister by choice,

Michele Pierce



(Editor’s note: Deborah Nave, who worked in Dalton, was killed in February.)