Mark Millican: Don’t get Febru-weary!

Published 8:00 am Tuesday, February 6, 2024

Around 10 years ago, Teresa and I were invited to an April wedding up north; well, up north-central. While descending toward the Minneapolis-St. Paul airport, we noticed the landscape looked rather bland, i.e., brown. Back home we had verdancy with trees and shrubs sprouting leaves, and the colorful vibrancy of flower buds rejoicing in the reason they were created. When we remarked on the monochromatic, sepia-like surroundings to our hosts, former Ellijay residents Mel and Lynette Donyes, they informed us their “snow pack” had just melted.

To the uninformed well below the Mason-Dixon Line, this is when you get so much snow and it stays so cold the dang stuff never melts in the colder months — you know, the same white weather that causes Southerners to drive crazily because of its infrequency. We marveled, since we’d only seen flakes or a least a light dusting in the North Georgia mountains that season. To beat it all, on the day after the wedding we awakened to another inch of snow in River Falls, Wisconsin, as we got ready for church.

As stated before in this corner, I do not agree with British-American poet T.S. Eliot who penned “April is the cruelest month.” Perhaps the phrase’s literary progenitor “The Waste Land” is describing England in April — like Minnesota and Wisconsin — but in the summer-rich South we’re tired of the brown and gray woods around us by the time February rolls around.

And to beat it all, we get an extra day of it this Leap Year.

In the search for some enlightenment in winter’s darker days, I went online to do some research on February. Here’s what I found, compliments of dictionary.com (with some asides).

“Where did the word February come from? Since other months, like January, are named after Roman gods, you’d be forgiven for thinking February was named after the Roman god Februus. But the word February comes from the Roman festival of purification called Februa, during which people were ritually washed. In this case, the god was named after the festival, not the other way around.”

I’m thinking that back in the day there was nothing like a good washing, ritually or otherwise, after you had gone without a bath for several weeks in the winter because there was no hot water. Wives and husbands would concur.

“Why was February called cabbage month? Before we adopted the Latin name for our second month, Old English used much more vibrant names to describe the month now known as February. The most common Old English name was ‘Solmonath,’ which literally means ‘mud month.’ A lesser-used term was ‘Kale-monath,’ which meant cabbage month. Perhaps the medieval English were eating a lot of cabbage in February? Strange.”

But not as strange as the blood sausage known as “haggis” favored by the Scots, just a tad farther north in the British Isles.

“What do we celebrate in February? We may not have a festival of ritual washing, but February is a big month for holidays:

• “Valentine’s Day is held Feb. 14 and has a pretty interesting origin story, if we might add. Find out the history behind its namesake here: dictionary.com/e/valentine/.

• “February is Black History Month. Black history is American history, and it’s vital we continue or revisit our learning all year round — and not only during February.” (More to come on this later in the month.)

• “We honor the achievements of our leaders, past and present, with Presidents’ Day. This … holiday originally recognized the birthday of our first president and dollar bill cover model, George Washington.” and don’t forget Honest Abe, who allegedly read comic books by lantern light. (That’s a joke, presidential historians, so you have no right to be offended in this age of aggrievement, misperceived oppression and entitlement.)

• “If you were born between Jan. 21-Feb. 18, then you’re celebrating your status as an Aquarius, and you just might be humanitarian and creative … Those born Feb. 19-March 20 are known as intuitive and romantic Pisces.” So obviously the yearning-for-spring season of love with Valentine’s Day lingers to include the Pisceans. and for those who may be theologically offended by the mention of the celestial signs, read “The Real Meaning of the Zodiac” by Pastor D. James Kennedy.

And so February also lingers, especially in 2024 with that extra day. But hang in there, because you don’t really have much choice unless you travel south. Spring is right around the corner, yet my wife keeps reminding me the Blizzard of ‘93 came in mid-March — which is technically still winter!

If that appears to be on the way again, I’m booking a flight to Daytona Beach.

Mark Millican is a former staff writer for the Dalton Daily Citizen.